Sunday, January 17, 2010

STAINLESS STEEL IS MORE PRACTICAL!













Ladies words don’t come easily telling you all how much this ole grandma has missed all of you. Now Just Between Me and You it has been one heck of a trial living without access to the internet.



Now let’s see where I start with catching up! I did promise to tell you some New Years stories from work but I am afraid I have slept a few times since then so I may not be able to tell them the way they should be told.

Being the New Years weekend we dealt with mostly drunks and drug users. The morning started early with two being arrested for possession of Controlled Substance. One was a female that was picked up with her boyfriend. They were from out of town and really messed up. The boyfriend lay down and only wanted to sleep but the girl……..oh such another story. Very seldom do we arrest someone dressed in evening clothes but it does happen. She had on a very lovely evening gown and I knew immediately this was not going to be good. First she had to turn over all her beautiful jewelry and take off the expensive heels only to exchange them for inmate shower shoes. The look on her face when I ask for her heels and gave her the sandals was priceless. Out of respect for her I tried to be as casual and nice about it as I could be but she refused to take her high heels off. I explained to her they were coming off one way or the other and she would not like the other. Finally she gave me the heels and then did not want to put the sandals on. I told her fine but these floors were not all that clean and was she sure about walking around barefoot. In the next hour I had to listen to how she came from a wealthy family from Alabama and it was a mistake for them to arrest her and in the long run her father would make sure we all would regret it. I kept shaking my head agreeing with her and at the same time Ms. Pearl was looking forward to putting her in a cell where we could no longer here her blabbering. After booking Ms Alabama in I put her with the other women and Ms Pearl laughed thinking about how the other women would handle this snob…. Ugly right …... When she was signing her release sheet she turns to me and says, “God what a life you live in such scum, I guess you deserve it!” I then knew Ms. Pearl would not keep quiet and sure enough ole MS. Pearl says …. Well, I DECLARE SUGAH, being from the south your momma should of taught you that when a southern woman has nothing else she still has her manners!....Didn’t your momma explain to you that….. YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE BORN WITH A SILVER SPOON IN YOUR MOUTH TO LIVE A RICH LIFE and haven’t you learned that in the long run STAINLESS STEEL IS MORE PRACTICAL, DON’T YOU THINK?”…. Stupid thing to say to her and where it came from is beyond me….Just goes to show you never know what Ms. Pearl might say…… lol… My crazy partner looks at me and says HUH! I laugh and say God I don’t know where that came from. I still haven’t a clue!

About an hour later my partners and I were in the office looking out the front doors when a sheriff’s car backs up on the sidewalk to the front door. We never take inmates in the front door so we had no idea what was going on. Then out of no where there were several officers surrounding this car where a female was in the back seat. I then grabbed my gloves because I knew this was not going to be good. Next minute their carrying her in to the jail and it takes all of them to keep her in custody. She was not a big girl in height but built like an athlete. (Come to find out at one time that’s exactly what she had been a few years back.)

I immediately started taking things out of her pockets and whatever jewelry she was wearing while they were carrying her because I knew that with the trouble she was giving them they were headed for the isolation tank with her. The girl was wearing five watches on both arms and enough change in her pockets to play for hours in a casino. I know on camera it must of looked pretty funny all these men carrying this woman and me trying to empty her pockets of all this change rolling all over the hall way and her screaming and calling us every name in the book. When I tried to get her belt off I swear ladies her head completely spun around just like in that horror movie and she started screaming YOU want me bitch!! Look at her trying to undress me the bitch wants me!!!!! Then she said I don’t know how many other crazy things but right before closing the door she turns to me and screams…..Bitch your going to hell!!!! …..Remember that picture I had of that woman on one of my post screaming well that’s how big and loud this woman was screaming at me. I kept thinking please Ms Pearl just ignore this woman because not only is the Chief carrying her but the Captain too. Hahahaha She again hollered your going to burn in hell for trying to touch my body. She then screams,” Look she’s a lezzy touching me and wanting me….” Gosh was I embarrassed.

Of course I had to have the last word or should I say, Ms Pearl did before the door shut… I told her “Honey JUST take a good look around you I am already in hell …….”

Honestly that was not the last word. Ended up for hours her screaming and me begging Ms. Pearl to not even go there with her. Thank goodness Ms Pearl was busy dealing with others.

It seems they brought her in because she was standing at the courthouse square shooting the finger at every one that drove by. Well being a small town that was just not heard of so off to the jail. Turns out we had to call MHMR and have her evaluated.

While dealing with her they bring in one drunk after the other. There was this one fool that kept trying his best to figure out how to open the cell door to holding. It was one of those times when you really had to be there to see how funny it looked. He kept asking me when I would walk by to please help him with this door because he could not get it open. Hahahaha I had to laugh at him because he just never gave up….

Then I pull out another drunk to book in and the answers he gave me to my booking questions were just toooooo funny.

Somehow he manages to stand up and get his picture taken but when I take him over to fingerprint him he passes out right on top of me. It had been a long day and I look down at him on the floor and I say “Yep this is hell!!!







Sweet Dreams Ladies!



Love

Maggie









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